gift for baby to give older sibling image
melgoede
I'm going to deliver tomorrow and am worried how my 18-month-old is going to take it. What are some of your experiences with bringing home a new sibling? Any suggestions on easing the transition?
We've already moved the 18-month-old out of the nursery a few weeks ago, into a bunk bed with his older brother. And there's no issues with bottles or nursing because he gave all that up at 11-months.
Answer
Have a gift waiting for him at the hospital for when he comes to see you and baby. Make sure you tell him that baby got it for him. Do not force him into anything baby related that he doesn't want to do. If he doesn't want to look at baby or kiss baby that is okay. He needs to be allowed to deal with it on his own terms. Please, please make sure you've got it set up that he does not have unsupervised contact with baby. Including not being able to reach baby while strapped in the back seat. I work retail and have seen many times where baby has scratches and bruises from toddler sibblings acting out and being down right cruel out of jealousy. Do your best to get him involved in helping with baby.
I found one good way is if I take a bath with my daughter I allow my son to climb in if he wants too. While nursing baby have him bring a book to read to him or sing rhymes with him. Do your best to spend time with him alone while someone else does baby duty.
It's hard to say how he'll respond. At that age they still have an extremely hard time controlling their impulses even though they know it's wrong. However you may get very lucky. I was expecting at least a bit of drama with my son when we brough his sister home. However the worse I've gotten out of him was he regressed in his eating habits. Before he had no problems feeding himself and now he wants me to feed him, especially if I'm nursing. LOL considering he had only figured out potty training about 4 months before his sister was due I can handle feeding him now and then. Much better then him regressing to diapers!
Have a gift waiting for him at the hospital for when he comes to see you and baby. Make sure you tell him that baby got it for him. Do not force him into anything baby related that he doesn't want to do. If he doesn't want to look at baby or kiss baby that is okay. He needs to be allowed to deal with it on his own terms. Please, please make sure you've got it set up that he does not have unsupervised contact with baby. Including not being able to reach baby while strapped in the back seat. I work retail and have seen many times where baby has scratches and bruises from toddler sibblings acting out and being down right cruel out of jealousy. Do your best to get him involved in helping with baby.
I found one good way is if I take a bath with my daughter I allow my son to climb in if he wants too. While nursing baby have him bring a book to read to him or sing rhymes with him. Do your best to spend time with him alone while someone else does baby duty.
It's hard to say how he'll respond. At that age they still have an extremely hard time controlling their impulses even though they know it's wrong. However you may get very lucky. I was expecting at least a bit of drama with my son when we brough his sister home. However the worse I've gotten out of him was he regressed in his eating habits. Before he had no problems feeding himself and now he wants me to feed him, especially if I'm nursing. LOL considering he had only figured out potty training about 4 months before his sister was due I can handle feeding him now and then. Much better then him regressing to diapers!
How to make a blended family work?
Ann_1731
I have a 2-1/2 year old son with my ex-husband. We get along good and share custody of our son. I am now in a serious relationship with someone that does not have children of his own. He is amazing with my son. My son loves his dad, but has also really taken well to my new relationship. This relationship is heading in the direction of marriage and he wants to have a child of his own. I am just so nervous about blending families. How will it be for my son if I had another child eventually? I don't want him to ever feel left out. Has anyone ever dealt with this?
Answer
There are lots of things you can do to ease the transition for your son. Getting him involved as much as you can from day one will really help him feel like he is part of the family - and like this is his younger sibling, not something less than that because it is his half sibling. When you are visibly pregnant, talk to him about what is going on and involve him in things like reading/singing to the growing baby, going to the doctor's to do sonograms of the baby, etc. Have him help to decorate the nursery and get things ready for the baby. And make sure that when there is a baby shower and everyone is showering the new baby with gifts, do something special for your son, too. Don't let him feel left out because the new baby is getting all of the attention and gifts.
I think it's also important to make sure that you have time alone with your son as well as time together with both of your children. It will help him not to feel so slighted by all the attention the new baby requires.
I've also seen some families do things such as hyphenate names so that the child doesn't feel left out because everyone else shares the same surname.
Good Luck!
There are lots of things you can do to ease the transition for your son. Getting him involved as much as you can from day one will really help him feel like he is part of the family - and like this is his younger sibling, not something less than that because it is his half sibling. When you are visibly pregnant, talk to him about what is going on and involve him in things like reading/singing to the growing baby, going to the doctor's to do sonograms of the baby, etc. Have him help to decorate the nursery and get things ready for the baby. And make sure that when there is a baby shower and everyone is showering the new baby with gifts, do something special for your son, too. Don't let him feel left out because the new baby is getting all of the attention and gifts.
I think it's also important to make sure that you have time alone with your son as well as time together with both of your children. It will help him not to feel so slighted by all the attention the new baby requires.
I've also seen some families do things such as hyphenate names so that the child doesn't feel left out because everyone else shares the same surname.
Good Luck!
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